View Full Version : I'm interested in the army but I have a family
Anonymous
12-31-1969, 07:00 PM
I am looking for info. about the army.**I have been thinking about it for along time.**(About 89' when my son was bourn) He is now turning 9 and i'mstill interested.**I don't want my life to go by wondering if I could havemade it.** I have a good job in a dental office and I am happy there.**I lovemy family and my life is fine.**I am turing 25 in Dec. and I want a change.Will the army still want me with a family?**My parents are behind me all theway and they feel it will be good for me in the long run.**Any info. will behelpful.**Thank you for your time.Krysti
<hr size=7 width=75%>
Heaven0916@aol.com
Anonymous
12-31-1969, 07:00 PM
Hi!**I'm also 25 and will be joining in 3 months.**I don't have a family so I'm not exactly sure what the process is, but I think that if you are not married you have to give custody of your children to someone else (i.e. your parents) while you're on active duty.**Depending on which type of job you'll be doing you could be working 9-5 monday to friday, so the only time you'd really be away from your son is the 2 months you'd be spending in basic training.**Check with a recruiter.**If this is something you've been thinking about for a long time you might really regret not giving it a shot.**Cheers! Hannah**
<hr size=7 width=75%>
hannahp@uipl.com
Anonymous
12-31-1969, 07:00 PM
KrystiThe military life is demanding but the rewards-with or without a family, are many!**When I joined, I too, had a family:**husband and 2 sons.**The first year was the hardest.**The rewards have been well worth it:**it was a family decision.**My sons have traveled extensively and know the world.**They learned to adjust rapidly and to make friends easily.**They became very independent and absorbed parts of every culture we visited.**I deployed twice:**once for 6 months and once for 10 months.**Even though I was married, I had to have a family care plan and to make sure that all of their needs would be addressed while I was away.**The separations were difficult but made staying in touch with them a creative challenge:**we corresponded by taped messages (frequently), they sent me their homework and report cards, I sent them special, individual letters.**I took lots of pictures and had them mailed to them from the developer.**They sent me tons of pictures of ball games, parties, friends, pets and such.**** Single parents had a slightly bigger challange but most seemed to adjust to the realities with careful planning.****** You need to discuss all aspects with a recruiter and perhaps if you do decide to join, ask for the names of other recruits in your specialty or at the nearest post and "pick their brains."****** It was good for us!
<hr size=7 width=75%>
freemanl_va@yahoo.com
Anonymous
12-31-1969, 07:00 PM
Being in the military is really tough even with two parents.**Between deployments, long hours, field time, duty etc, I think my kids get short changed alot.**Don't get me wrong, I love what I do, but the key word is sacrifice and its mostly the kids that have to do it.: I am looking for info. about the army.**I have been thinking about it for along time.**(About 89' when my son was bourn) He is now turning 9 and i'mstill interested.**I don't want my life to go by wondering if I could havemade it.** I have a good job in a dental office and I am happy there.**I lovemy family and my life is fine.**I am turing 25 in Dec. and I want a change.Will the army still want me with a family?**My parents are behind me all theway and they feel it will be good for me in the long run.**Any info. will behelpful.**Thank you for your time.Krysti
<hr size=7 width=75%>
billingsk@seacove.net
Anonymous
12-31-1969, 07:00 PM
: Linda, Yes i know it will be a family desison but I'm just wondering how much of a strain it will be on my marriage and my family.**** You are wise to be concerned about the strain this decision will place on your marriage and your family.**The strain can be tremendous!**Even with the strongest relationships, some did not survive.**We had some pretty rough spots and my husband encountered more pressure than we had anticipated.**He learned to hate being a "dependent" and ultimately we agreed to "live" civilian.**We did not live on post.**My husband received a lot of comments about being kept and not being "a real man"-fortunately he also had a sense of humor but it still got to him at times.**If your husband is not behind you, the strain will be even more.****When I had to deploy to Saudi Arabia, my husband threatened to leave unless I refused to go.**He was worried, really worried about me and that was his way of coping at first.****Can you do it?**Sure.**Should you do it?**That decision has to be up to you.**It sounds like you need to do a lot more talking with your husband and family.**** My husband is in but getting out soon.**He feels its not for him.**I have given up alot for my family and maybe i'm being selfish but I would like to do this for me.**Everyone has been so helpful already.**I'd like to know if it is even possiable for me to do this?**Or will i be fighting a lossing battle.**My husband isn't too clear on the rules or maybe he just hopes i'll forget about it.**It's hard to forget about something that's been inside for over almost 10 years!**Thanks for you time. krysti**** My husband had been in the Navy during "Nam.**It was not for him.**He had to deal with my success in a career that he had chosen not to be for him-and that was rough at times.**The male ego is a strange, but challenging reality!**Men can be rough on each other! **** Would I have joined if he had been totally opposed and if our kids had been unwilling to even "give it a chance"?**No, I would not.Our family was primary.**I am a strong, independent woman but my independent choice would have been made based upon its impact upon our marriage and family.**There were other options:**the reserves for instance.**** We agreed to one tour and then to re-evaluate.**After 3 years, we decided to stay on for another tour and then another and another.**The military was never an option that was more important than us.**** Good luck!**Linda
<hr size=7 width=75%>
freemanl_va@yahoo.com
Anonymous
12-31-1969, 07:00 PM
Linda, Yes i know it will be a family desison but I'm just wondering how much of a strain it will be on my marriage and my family.**I have a 9 year old son and he likes to travle but enjoys having his grandparents near by.**My husband is in but getting out soon.**He feels its not for him.**I have given up alot for my family and maybe i'm being selfish but I would like to do this for me.**Everyone has been so helpful already.**I'd like to know if it is even possiable for me to do this?**Or will i be fighting a lossing battle.**My husband isn't too clear on the rules or maybe he just hopes i'll forget about it.**It's hard to forget about something that's been inside for over almost 10 years!**Thanks for you time. krysti
<hr size=7 width=75%>
heaven0916@aol.com